I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
