Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
