i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
