Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
