dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
