I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
