So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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