no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize