i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Are we still banned from the library?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
