I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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