i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
