sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize