Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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