Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize