some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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