i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
this boner is exhausting
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
