May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
