with your own penis?
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
