i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize