Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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