I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
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