If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize
