Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize