I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Damn victory sex feels great
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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