I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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