White coat. Heels.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
