yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
