I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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