used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
