I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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