8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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