man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
