I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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