Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize