ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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