I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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