So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
