Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
