So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My dick has a subreddit
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
