im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
