I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
