we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
