Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
