Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize