My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize