There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
