seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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