you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
