Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
