shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
