I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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